I’ve been working my whole life, held up five jobs at times, because I thought it was necessary. Stocking shelves at Copp’s grocery store and Target, selling shoe products at Finish Line, moving furniture, cleaning apartments, painting houses, mowing lawns, bailing hay, selling drugs, porn and realistically, anything I could get my hands on. After I got accepted into college, life suddenly changed. Why? The only difference, I put on my application that I was a student at UW. Great positions in bartending, marketing, broadcasting, media production, journalism started coming my way. And while I’ve made a big name for myself through incessant hard work, and many know my brand by name, I could have lied and possibly secured some of the same positions that I did.

I’ve been rejected by HUNDREDS upon HUNDREDS of companies over the years. The amount of time I’ve spent on these places, just trying to get an answer, is insurmountable. Corporate America does not want to give you a chance. Ninety percent of the places you’re most excited about won’t even give you the courtesy of telling you to fuck off. Their success depends on your failure.

My advice: lie and cheat as much as you possibly can to get your “dream job” in corporate America. Figure the rest of that shit out later. I’ve learned how to amp myself up over the course of my experience in entertainment, where the spring of fake lies. That being said, I would never wish that same amount stress upon anyone else.

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